I will listen, if you
​
​sing a song for me.
You’re the only free one,
because you forget too much
and too often.

Could be preoccupation,
which I don’t see,
or the slime in your brain--
confusion not compliance.

Help me forget for a moment
and hear to listen
like shooting unseen
footage to kill time.

Like a cat in an unopened box,
like repression,
known to be unintentional,
you can help me forget.

You can help me out,
and we will be collective
with our absent minds,
in our intentions.

As the years become months,
months carry days,
days fold into hours,
hours drip to minutes,

seconds carry on
the sweetest hymns


H.E. Buttz

I had cable T.V. once and spent countless hours watching Chopped on Food TV.
Living in the land of plenty, it never occurred to me that one day I too would need to master the mix and match skills of these top chop chefs.

I have come to the realization, during this COVID-19 captivity, I will stay put and stay alive by foraging through my freezer, refrigerator, and cupboards.

What will I do to survive?

1. Mindset Adjustment: Pretend…no…realize that I can't go to the grocery store whenever I want to. I will only make the 20 mile round trip when I NEED something (which might not be for two months or when the toilet paper runs out).

2. Check Inventory:
Yup, it’s time to get a chair so I can level up to my shelves.
Twelve cans of tuna,
Eight cans of tomatoes (in various forms),
Rice noodles (unopened, expired in 2014),
Jello (expired), and
Many boxes with a whisper of dust at the bottom (too little to make anything substantial with).

3. Meal Plans: With inventory clearly sitting in front of me, I started categorically grouping meals.

Chinese: Water chestnuts + bean sprouts = egg foo young. And yes, I have 30 packets and two full bottles of soy sauce in my refrigerator plus 13 eggs. 

Italian: Noodles (I have oodles) + a can or two of tomatoes and spices + onion and one half of a green pepper for texture and flavor = “perfecto” spaghetti.

Depression Era: Tuna + Cream of Mushroom Soup + toast or noodles (I have oodles) or boxed mashed potatoes + celery (which is wilted) and onions for texture and flavor =  Creamed Tuna over something.

Japanese: One Ramen Noodle + cabbage left over from St. Patrick’s Day = Ramen noodle salad.

Veg Out: Black olives + green olives + salad dressing + lettuce which is still fresh + celery + carrots + bread squares leftover from Thanksgiving stuffing (substituting for croutons) = A Perfect Salad.

Brunch: Dust from all pancake mixes and Bisquick = pancakes. Bonus: Frozen blueberries.

4. What’s left?

Chopped - COVID-19 Style.

Aided by Pinterest and Google combine the odds and ends.

Tomatoes + White Beans = White Beans with Tomatoes and Garlic

Cellophane noodles = Ants Climbing a Tree (w/o the beef or pork because I have none)

Canned tomatoes made into salsa served with tortillas (frozen leftovers from New Year’s Day) + shredded cheese = nachos
Bonus: Add canned beans for a hearty vegetarian chili.

Canned Pineapple + Rice = Pineapple fried rice with shrimp (yup, 3 bags of frozen shrimp)

Jello + Oatmeal = Berry crisp with jello (I have frozen blueberries, oatmeal, and jello - SCORE!)

Moral of this story:
Good happens when one adjusts their mindset. 

A scarcity mindset is small (I have nothing).
A scarcity mindset limits (therefore I horde).
A scarcity mindset reacts (I will starve).
A scarcity mindset knows it all (I can’t make new recipes).

An abundance mindset yields… 
- Happiness. The glass is half full or overflowing if poured in a shot glass.
- Proactive. Assess what I have to work with and makes new plans.
- Thinks Big. There’s no limitation to creativity. Think Chopped COVID-19 Edition!
- Learn. That’s what Google and Pintrest are for.

Life is short, live large, believe in the endless possibilities your cupboards have to offer and choose to live an abundant life creating memorable meals during COVID-19 captivity.

Happy Eating.

Rudolph

Real story. But don’t judge me because I choose to have a free-range cat.

For months cat didn’t catch a thing.
I caught more mice in my silverware drawer than she did…and she has an acre outside all to herself.

Since last week, when all after work meetings were canceled and I was home every night,
she has taken a particular interest in hunting.

Since Sunday, she’s brought in 3 mice and one very large bird (which wasn’t dead and I finally caught and released).
She has a special call when she brings in the dead. 
"Come and get it…come and get it.”

And I do go and get it and throw it away
(unless it’s alive) then i practice catch and release.

Last night, I heard her come in…
trot across the floor but she said nothing.
Then she came to visit.

She has a favorite spot to bring her kill (and eat it).
My suspicion was right.
There, neatly laid next to each other like stacked cord wood were 2 dead mice.

Yup, she’s listening to the chatter on the t.v. and self-preparing for the inevitable shutdown of the grocery stores.

Shine Bright.
​
Rudolph

​Quarantine (a place of isolation) isn’t anything new to me.
I’ve worked from home for 11+ years.
My morning commute is 29 feet.
Putting that into perspective, breakfast is further away than my office. 

Even though I stayed in my house/my yard for days without any angst,
now that the Governor has mandated me to stay - I want to leave.

Don’t think of the pink elephant!

As I go about my day…
the fear of running out of toilet paper and bread,
thoughts of the COVID-19 virus covering my morning newspaper,
and the realization that I too will run out of actual food (in about 2 months),
scamper through my thoughts the second my computer screen flashes a message or my phone dings.

“Ha, ha…made you look!!” laughs the electronic devices.
These conduits of connection have become my enemies of isolation.

The grass isn’t greener where I am not.

And then my rational self reminds me…
You don’t like going to parties and crowded places.
You'd rather be making a difference than idle chit-chat.
You have lawn to rake, sticks to pick up, flower gardens to clean…a garden to ready for seeds.
You have real work to get done.
And a baby blanket to finish for your niece’s birth (which took place 29 years ago).

So for now…
I have more than enough work to quiet my restless mind.

And then a new fear emerges…
what if the quarantine ends before my projects are done?

Shine Bright,

​Rudolph

Hello!

This blog was created as a space for y'all to share your first hand experiences during quarantine.  Hoping it will bring you laughter and relieve some stress, even amongst so much uncertainty.

Guidelines for Submissions:

Submit your stories via email to hannabraaten@icloud.com.
You can choose to remain anonymous, share your name, or use an alias... whatever you are most comfortable with!
Please refrain from using inappropriate language and explicits.